Divorce is never easy. While most are usually contested in some way, not all end in a dogfight. In fact, according to statistics, most Texas divorces can be resolved outside of court—even if they aren’t always amicable.
A high conflict divorce, however, is highly contentious and often marked by emotionally manipulative and abusive behavior. This can have significant mental, physical, and financial repercussions on everyone involved. As a result, it’s more important than ever to have an experienced family law attorney you can trust fighting on your side.
Here’s what you need to know about hiring a high conflict divorce lawyer in Texas and what the Warren & Migliaccio team can do to protect your rights and help you navigate this emotionally charged situation.
What is a High Conflict Divorce?
A high conflict divorce is an extremely contentious type of contested divorce. Unlike an uncontested divorce (where the parties can agree on all major aspects of their dissolution without help from an attorney), contested divorces are marked by disagreement. These disputes usually require the help of lawyers, divorce mediation, and sometimes even a judge to settle.
High conflict divorces are more than just contested. These breakups are downright volatile and are often marked by anger, revenge-seeking behavior, and a desire to get back at the other person at any cost. This dynamic creates an incredibly toxic environment, taking a huge emotional, physical, and financial toll on everyone involved. It makes a stressful situation much worse and adds unnecessary complications to an already complex legal process.
Who is at Risk for a High Conflict Divorce?
There is no checklist for what qualifies as a high conflict divorce and what doesn’t. Like many things in life, the severity of these breakups falls on a scale, and the triggers can be as broad and varied as the couples themselves. However, specific outside indicators can put you at a higher risk of ending up in this situation.
For example, the following patterns and behaviors often lead to a very contentious divorce proceedings:
- A history of drug or alcohol abuse.
- Habitual lying and deceit.
- Failure to take accountability.
- Blaming others for problems.
- A revenge-centered mentality.
- Combative behavior.
- Certain mental Illnesses.
- An inability to Compromise
- Undermining and putdowns.
- Physical abuse.
- Emotional manipulation, such as gaslighting.
Personality disorders such as narcissism, borderline personality, histrionic, paranoia, and antisocial behavior can have a huge impact on divorce. Individuals with these mental health conditions struggle to regulate and maintain their emotions, which can often lead to explosive and irrational results. The same can be said for alcohol and other substance abuse. When someone is not fully in control of their faculties, they become unpredictable and irrational, making it much harder to negotiate and communicate effectively.
The Specialized Skills of a High Conflict Divorce Attorney
A high conflict divorce lawyer understands the unique challenges that often arise in these highly-charged situations. They also have a fluid understanding of Texas family law and are adept at applying this knowledge to the specific legal hurdles that this dynamic often brings to regular, everyday divorce issues. Here’s a closer look.
Property Division
Texas is a community property state, which means all property, debt, and assets acquired during the marriage belong to both spouses equally—regardless of whose name is on the contract, deed, check, or card. However, that doesn’t always stop a vengeful spouse from trying to take more than their fair share. This can be particularly problematic in a high asset divorce.
High conflict divorce lawyers know the tricks people use to hide assets from divorce court, and can help ensure you get your fair share out of these complex property disputes.
Child Custody
Tragically, the people who are often hurt the most by divorce are the ones who deserve it the least. This is especially true for a high conflict custody case mired in toxic strife. In these situations, it’s not uncommon for an unstable parent to try and use their child as a bargaining tool during negotiations or using parental alienation tactics against the other parent.
A skilled family law attorney can help you take measures to protect your child from these dysfunctional behaviors and any potential domestic violence. This might mean filing a protective order, restraining order, or petitioning for temporary child custody. They will also highlight any disruptive or problematic parenting trends to the court and advocate passionately for the child custody and parenting time outcome that is most likely to serve your child’s best interest.
Spousal Support
Another hotly contended area in divorce is spousal support. Also known as alimony, these regular payments are designed to help a supporting spouse get back on their feet after divorce and ensure they are not unfairly financially punished for choosing to part ways.
In Texas, spousal support is determined based on things like the length of marriage, income, employment opportunities, and education. Support is temporary and may not be available in every divorce. However, it is automatically awarded to survivors who have experienced family violence within two years of filing for divorce.
Unfortunately, abuse is not uncommon in a high-conflict situation. A skilled lawyer can cut through the gaslighting and manipulation tactics to find the truth and help you get the compensation you deserve.
Tools for Navigating a High Conflict Divorce
One of the best things about having an attorney representing you during divorce is that they’ve seen it all before. You are not their first high conflict situation. They’ve seen this drama before, which means they know exactly how to anticipate the pitfalls that come with a challenging spouse, saving you a lot of time, money, and mental energy as a result.
As you go throughout this process, here are four key tools to help you navigate a high conflict breakup:
- Be Decisive. Recognize the situation for what it is and work with your attorney to develop a decisive plan of action. This knowledge can help relieve stress and empower you to stay firm in your resolve.
- Be Dispassionate. Your spouse knows exactly how to push your buttons, but it’s important not to get entangled in passionate, emotional disputes. These fights serve no purpose and siphon off precious emotional energy. Don’t be afraid to walk away or disengage if you are feeling triggered.
- Be Deliberate. Clear, concise language is the best approach when dealing with volatile individuals. Pay attention to how you communicate and be dispassionate and logical whenever possible.
- Document. Make sure to carefully document any interactions that you have with your spouse—especially when abuse and children are involved. Any documentation you collect will help strengthen your case now and in any post-divorce modifications you might need to make.
At the end of the day, the best thing to do is speak to an experienced family lawyer. A high-conflict divorce attorney will give you much-needed distance from your spouse and protect your rights during this emotionally charged transition.
Talk to an Experienced High Conflict Divorce Lawyer
Divorce is draining—especially in a high conflict situation—however, it isn’t something you should have to do alone. At Warren & Migliaccio, we’re passionate about fighting for our clients’ rights and interests. If you have questions about hiring a high conflict divorce lawyer, we want to hear from you. Call our offices today at (888) 584-9614 for a free consultation, or contact us online and let one of our experienced high conflict attorneys help make this complex divorce process easier for you.